Ice Cube Trays

Earlier this year, I assumed sometime over the summer, perhaps June or so, my refrigerator broke and I needed to buy a new one. Before writing this post, I decided to look at the receipt to see whether it was June or later.

Consider me shocked.

The refrigerator was delivered at the end of April.

I’ve been on the road for so many weeks this year, I’ve totally lost track of time. And now, after getting home from five consecutive weeks away, I’m trying to restore some semblance of order in my life, but it hasn’t been easy.

There are a bazillion little things that I need to do and have not been doing because I wasn’t home to do them. Of course there are the obvious tasks like sifting through weeks worth of mail delivered while I was away (barely started), or getting some groceries (got a few things), or less tangible tasks like re-adjusting once more to this time zone (not going well).

And then there are other tasks, insidious tasks, that lead to a lack of comfort in my life. And until I take care of them, they don’t get done and I live without.

Thus, the lack of ice in my home.

You see, I bought a refrigerator that needed to be a certain size to fit up the stairs of the 100+ year old building where I live. And the model I got has an automatic ice maker. That would be lovely, if I could hook the refrigerator up to a water source to produce the ice – but I can’t – because I live in a 100+ year old building that wasn’t constructed to provide a water source to a refrigerator 100 years in the future. And so, when I bought the refrigerator it did not come with “old fashioned” ice cube trays.

And it is very easy to buy ice cube trays. You just go to the store and buy them. But when you are home for 48 hours, have to do laundry, pack a suitcase and run to the airport again, there is no time to dedicate to the frivolity of ice cube trays. The lack of ice at home is inconsequential in those circumstances.

You may laugh when you see how shocked I am that I have not had ice in my house since April, but to me, it is a serious matter. It means that in so many ways, my life is frayed at the seams and I must expend significant energy to get my home life back on track.

So it was, last night, that I decided I wanted to find the most decadent ice cube trays I could find for my empty freezer. I toddled over to my neighborhood Bits, Bytes and Beautification and found a regular set of ice cube trays (sadly, I only had to pay $2.99) and another set of tiny half-inch cubette ice cube trays for another $2.99. When I got them home, I filled each tray with bottled spring water and slid them onto the shelves.

It was a miracle to have ice in my water today. I haven’t had ice in my drinks at home in six months.

Now you’ll have to please excuse me, I have some mail to read, laundry to wash, and a suitcase to put on the shelf… for now.

A fallow moment

Fallow, adj: Plowed and harrowed but left unsown for a period in order to restore its fertility

As you may (or may not) have noticed, my writing productivity has slowed this month on the blog. It’s not just the blog actually, it is also in my writing, and submitting activities too.

I’ve been rejuvenating myself physically, and psychologically.

The last several months have been challenging on a few levels. I haven’t talked about it on the blog, and I likely won’t, but I feel like I’m waiting to get through this tunnel…I can see the shafts of light streaming through the opening at the end, but I haven’t emerged into full sunlight yet.

Some positives help keep me going. I’ve been working hard on my physical being. This means, for me, walking 5-6 miles a day, eating mostly vegetables, taking vitamins and combatting my insomnia.

It’s strange, but I seem to have a nearly inhuman amount of energy from this new regimen. I’m so amped up with energy from the exercise and possibly the vitamins (?) it has dampened my appetite. I’m eating only once a day.

It’s bizarre to say this, but the less I eat, the higher my energy levels get. It’s completely counter-intuitive. And yet…I’ve lost 11 pounds thusfar. I feel good, with more to go.

Also gratifying to see is my blog traffic has miraculously maintained itself pretty well even though I’ve cut back on postings. Many thanks to all of you who continue to participate in and ponder the posts here. I love the idea that a global community of writers comes to my blog, and I love hearing from all of you.

As for the rest of my life…I’m putting my energies where they need to be: being around friends, drawing on the advice of work colleagues, experts and gurus, continuing to draw on an amazing support network of people I know and care about, and pushing forward.

Thanks for listening, and reading. 🙂

A gray day in Jersey City

It’s eerily calm out right now, and gray. Last night, I lay awake at 2, 3 and then 4am and watched tiny flakes of snow hit the pavement and disappear – nothing stuck and it’s all wet black pavement without traces of white. It’s also not cold enough for snow.

I couldn’t sleep in my bed because it was too comfortable. It was strange, tossing back and forth all warm and supported by my cushy mattress and unable to find the right spot. So I went to the living room and wedged my body into my couch, which feels fine when you first lay your body down, but the longer you stay in one spot it feels like it’s made out of concrete.

I watched re-runs on television. This re-run was of a man going to Hawaii to pick cacao pods. Then he showed the process from picking the pod to making dark chocolate.

I finally fell asleep around 4:30am, and slept until 9 and then decided what the hell and fell back asleep again for a few more hours because my brain still wasn’t working.

I’m sitting up as I write this and every joint in my body is saying thanks a lot for the brilliant idea of sleeping on the couch but in a way, I’m glad for the discomfort. It makes me want to get up and do something (other than write this blog post.)

This post feels like a Random Insomnia Post, which I used to write on the blog awhile back, even though it’s the middle of the day right now. I guess you can have insomnia any time within a 24 hour cycle, I just never thought about it that way. Maybe I would if I worked the night shift and tried to sleep when the sun is shining and it’s beautiful outside. That’s probably the worst kind of insomnia, actually.

Just as I write this, the sun is fighting to peek through the clouds. It’s like someone turning up the volume on a great song you love that comes on the radio while you’re driving down the highway and tapping your fingers on the steering wheel…but then turning it back down again when the gray clouds win.